Sunday, October 28, 2012
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Do You Lack Self Confidence?
Traits associated with low self-confidence include:
- Undervaluing your experience and abilities; writing yourself off as being “no good at anything”
- Accepting the blame for things when it isn’t your fault
- Holding back, especially in groups, and dreading sharing your opinion – or anything about yourself or your life; being very shy and reserved
- Having unrealistic, perfectionist standards for yourself – and at the same time being highly self-critical
- Obsessing over things that went wrong in the past (especially if was something you said or did)
- Being preoccupied with the negative outcomes and potential failures (And what people will think of you – as a consequence of that)
- Being fearful of a wide range of people and situation; dreading going, or doing, something new
- Doing things to please others – even when it’s thing you really don’t want to do (for fear of disapproval, rejection, or losing face)
Body Language Cues
Kiss Me
She’s leaning in a little bit, she’s looking at you with an inviting smile, she’s touching your arm, she’s even tilted her head a little… what are you waiting for? Go for it!
She’s leaning in a little bit, she’s looking at you with an inviting smile, she’s touching your arm, she’s even tilted her head a little… what are you waiting for? Go for it!
Get Away From Me Now
Arms crossed and an annoyed expression? She’s pulling away every time you try to touch her? He’s backing away every time you try to get closer? All of these spell out one thing and we’re not sure what you did but you’d better leave them alone.
Arms crossed and an annoyed expression? She’s pulling away every time you try to touch her? He’s backing away every time you try to get closer? All of these spell out one thing and we’re not sure what you did but you’d better leave them alone.
Slumped Posture
This could mean a number of things but we’re always sure that it’s a sign of a really bad day. They’re either sad, discouraged, hurt or fearful about something. You should definitely see if they’re going to be all right.
This could mean a number of things but we’re always sure that it’s a sign of a really bad day. They’re either sad, discouraged, hurt or fearful about something. You should definitely see if they’re going to be all right.
Try It And See What Happens
See, the phrase “try it and see what happens” could mean something completely different depending on how it’s said but the body language here is telling you that something good will happen…
Don’t Even Think About It
The body language here is telling you that if you do decide to “try it” then “what happens” is probably going to hurt. Hands on hips is never a good sign! We’re warning you dude, don’t do it!
See, the phrase “try it and see what happens” could mean something completely different depending on how it’s said but the body language here is telling you that something good will happen…
Don’t Even Think About It
The body language here is telling you that if you do decide to “try it” then “what happens” is probably going to hurt. Hands on hips is never a good sign! We’re warning you dude, don’t do it!
Playing with her hair
This one is kind of a no-brainer, if a woman is playing with her hair while she talks to you, she’s probably flirting with you… but she could also be trying to get the hair out of her eyes. Make sure it’s more of a “you’re really cute” gesture and less of a “I really hate my new haircut” sort of thing.
This one is kind of a no-brainer, if a woman is playing with her hair while she talks to you, she’s probably flirting with you… but she could also be trying to get the hair out of her eyes. Make sure it’s more of a “you’re really cute” gesture and less of a “I really hate my new haircut” sort of thing.
The Handshake
A strong handshake is good but when it’s too strong it could be a sign of insecurity. When it’s too soft, it could mean lack of interest. The best handshake is when your palm touches theirs, it is a sign of sincerity and openness for a good relationship.
A strong handshake is good but when it’s too strong it could be a sign of insecurity. When it’s too soft, it could mean lack of interest. The best handshake is when your palm touches theirs, it is a sign of sincerity and openness for a good relationship.
Mirror, Mirror
When someone is mirroring what you do, it means that they are on the same page as you. In dating it’s a sign of attraction.
When someone is mirroring what you do, it means that they are on the same page as you. In dating it’s a sign of attraction.
Avoiding Glance
When a person can’t look you in the eyes while speaking it could mean they are nervous but it usually means they are being dishonest about something. When they avoid eye contact while listening, it could mean they are not paying attention, they’re angry or that they have some bad news to admit.
When a person can’t look you in the eyes while speaking it could mean they are nervous but it usually means they are being dishonest about something. When they avoid eye contact while listening, it could mean they are not paying attention, they’re angry or that they have some bad news to admit.
Maintaining Eye Contact
When someone gives eye contact while speaking, it’s a sign of honesty. When someone gives eye contact while listening, it’s a sign of respect.
When someone gives eye contact while speaking, it’s a sign of honesty. When someone gives eye contact while listening, it’s a sign of respect.
Leaning In
This is a great sign. If the person you’re talking to is leaning in as you talk, it means that they are completely engaged in you and your conversation together.
This is a great sign. If the person you’re talking to is leaning in as you talk, it means that they are completely engaged in you and your conversation together.
Raised Eyebrow
This could mean that a person is confused but it’s also a sign that the person is interested in what you’re saying and they want to know more.
This could mean that a person is confused but it’s also a sign that the person is interested in what you’re saying and they want to know more.
Fidgeting
This is often considered a nervous habit but it could also be a sign of impatience or discomfort. If someone is fidgeting a lot, they may need some comforting words or even some space.
This is often considered a nervous habit but it could also be a sign of impatience or discomfort. If someone is fidgeting a lot, they may need some comforting words or even some space.
Eye Roll
This one is kind of a no-brainer, they are seriously annoyed by whatever you just said. Choose your next words wisely!
This one is kind of a no-brainer, they are seriously annoyed by whatever you just said. Choose your next words wisely!
Whisper in the Ear
This is a sign of intimacy and wanting to be closer to each other.
This is a sign of intimacy and wanting to be closer to each other.
Monday, October 22, 2012
The Nine Types of Intelligence
. Naturalist Intelligence (“Nature Smart”)
Designates the human ability to discriminate among living things (plants, animals) as well as sensitivity to other features of the natural world (clouds, rock configurations). This ability was clearly of value in our evolutionary past as hunters, gatherers, and farmers; it continues to be central in such roles as botanist or chef. It is also speculated that much of our consumer society exploits the naturalist intelligences, which can be mobilized in the discrimination among cars, sneakers, kinds of makeup, and the like.
2. Musical Intelligence (“Musical Smart”)
Musical intelligence is the capacity to discern pitch, rhythm, timbre, and tone. This intelligence enables us to recognize, create, reproduce, and reflect on music, as demonstrated by composers, conductors, musicians, vocalist, and sensitive listeners. Interestingly, there is often an affective connection between music and the emotions; and mathematical and musical intelligences may share common thinking processes. Young adults with this kind of intelligence are usually singing or drumming to themselves. They are usually quite aware of sounds others may miss.
3. Logical-Mathematical Intelligence (Number/Reasoning Smart)
Logical-mathematical intelligence is the ability to calculate, quantify, consider propositions and hypotheses, and carry out complete mathematical operations. It enables us to perceive relationships and connections and to use abstract, symbolic thought; sequential reasoning skills; and inductive and deductive thinking patterns. Logical intelligence is usually well developed in mathematicians, scientists, and detectives. Young adults with lots of logical intelligence are interested in patterns, categories, and relationships. They are drawn to arithmetic problems, strategy games and experiments.
4.Existential Intelligence
Sensitivity and capacity to tackle deep questions about human existence, such as the meaning of life, why do we die, and how did we get here.
5. Interpersonal Intelligence (People Smart”)
Interpersonal intelligence is the ability to understand and interact effectively with others. It involves effective verbal and nonverbal communication, the ability to note distinctions among others, sensitivity to the moods and temperaments of others, and the ability to entertain multiple perspectives. Teachers, social workers, actors, and politicians all exhibit interpersonal intelligence. Young adults with this kind of intelligence are leaders among their peers, are good at communicating, and seem to understand others’ feelings and motives.
6. Bodily-Kinesthetic Intelligence (“Body Smart”)
Bodily kinesthetic intelligence is the capacity to manipulate objects and use a variety of physical skills. This intelligence also involves a sense of timing and the perfection of skills through mind–body union. Athletes, dancers, surgeons, and craftspeople exhibit well-developed bodily kinesthetic intelligence.
7. Linguistic Intelligence (Word Smart)
Linguistic intelligence is the ability to think in words and to use language to express and appreciate complex meanings. Linguistic intelligence allows us to understand the order and meaning of words and to apply meta-linguistic skills to reflect on our use of language. Linguistic intelligence is the most widely shared human competence and is evident in poets, novelists, journalists, and effective public speakers. Young adults with this kind of intelligence enjoy writing, reading, telling stories or doing crossword puzzles.
8. Intra-personal Intelligence (Self Smart”)
Intra-personal intelligence is the capacity to understand oneself and one’s thoughts and feelings, and to use such knowledge in planning and directioning one’s life. Intra-personal intelligence involves not only an appreciation of the self, but also of the human condition. It is evident in psychologist, spiritual leaders, and philosophers. These young adults may be shy. They are very aware of their own feelings and are self-motivated.
9. Spatial Intelligence (“Picture Smart”)
Spatial intelligence is the ability to think in three dimensions. Core capacities include mental imagery, spatial reasoning, image manipulation, graphic and artistic skills, and an active imagination. Sailors, pilots, sculptors, painters, and architects all exhibit spatial intelligence. Young adults with this kind of intelligence may be fascinated with mazes or jigsaw puzzles, or spend free time drawing or daydreaming.
Designates the human ability to discriminate among living things (plants, animals) as well as sensitivity to other features of the natural world (clouds, rock configurations). This ability was clearly of value in our evolutionary past as hunters, gatherers, and farmers; it continues to be central in such roles as botanist or chef. It is also speculated that much of our consumer society exploits the naturalist intelligences, which can be mobilized in the discrimination among cars, sneakers, kinds of makeup, and the like.
2. Musical Intelligence (“Musical Smart”)
Musical intelligence is the capacity to discern pitch, rhythm, timbre, and tone. This intelligence enables us to recognize, create, reproduce, and reflect on music, as demonstrated by composers, conductors, musicians, vocalist, and sensitive listeners. Interestingly, there is often an affective connection between music and the emotions; and mathematical and musical intelligences may share common thinking processes. Young adults with this kind of intelligence are usually singing or drumming to themselves. They are usually quite aware of sounds others may miss.
3. Logical-Mathematical Intelligence (Number/Reasoning Smart)
Logical-mathematical intelligence is the ability to calculate, quantify, consider propositions and hypotheses, and carry out complete mathematical operations. It enables us to perceive relationships and connections and to use abstract, symbolic thought; sequential reasoning skills; and inductive and deductive thinking patterns. Logical intelligence is usually well developed in mathematicians, scientists, and detectives. Young adults with lots of logical intelligence are interested in patterns, categories, and relationships. They are drawn to arithmetic problems, strategy games and experiments.
4.Existential Intelligence
Sensitivity and capacity to tackle deep questions about human existence, such as the meaning of life, why do we die, and how did we get here.
5. Interpersonal Intelligence (People Smart”)
Interpersonal intelligence is the ability to understand and interact effectively with others. It involves effective verbal and nonverbal communication, the ability to note distinctions among others, sensitivity to the moods and temperaments of others, and the ability to entertain multiple perspectives. Teachers, social workers, actors, and politicians all exhibit interpersonal intelligence. Young adults with this kind of intelligence are leaders among their peers, are good at communicating, and seem to understand others’ feelings and motives.
6. Bodily-Kinesthetic Intelligence (“Body Smart”)
Bodily kinesthetic intelligence is the capacity to manipulate objects and use a variety of physical skills. This intelligence also involves a sense of timing and the perfection of skills through mind–body union. Athletes, dancers, surgeons, and craftspeople exhibit well-developed bodily kinesthetic intelligence.
7. Linguistic Intelligence (Word Smart)
Linguistic intelligence is the ability to think in words and to use language to express and appreciate complex meanings. Linguistic intelligence allows us to understand the order and meaning of words and to apply meta-linguistic skills to reflect on our use of language. Linguistic intelligence is the most widely shared human competence and is evident in poets, novelists, journalists, and effective public speakers. Young adults with this kind of intelligence enjoy writing, reading, telling stories or doing crossword puzzles.
8. Intra-personal Intelligence (Self Smart”)
Intra-personal intelligence is the capacity to understand oneself and one’s thoughts and feelings, and to use such knowledge in planning and directioning one’s life. Intra-personal intelligence involves not only an appreciation of the self, but also of the human condition. It is evident in psychologist, spiritual leaders, and philosophers. These young adults may be shy. They are very aware of their own feelings and are self-motivated.
9. Spatial Intelligence (“Picture Smart”)
Spatial intelligence is the ability to think in three dimensions. Core capacities include mental imagery, spatial reasoning, image manipulation, graphic and artistic skills, and an active imagination. Sailors, pilots, sculptors, painters, and architects all exhibit spatial intelligence. Young adults with this kind of intelligence may be fascinated with mazes or jigsaw puzzles, or spend free time drawing or daydreaming.
Friday, October 19, 2012
How to Deal with Mistakes and Failures in Life
1. This is not the end. You are going to survive. There’s no point in pretending that life is always great. At times we trip and fall, or we make some bad mistakes. Allow yourself to heal, then get up and start again. Take one or two small steps … and know you’re going to survive!
2. Everybody makes mistakes along the way. You’re only a failure if you give up and don’t try. Accept that you are human … and move on with your life.
3. Positive thinking leads to positive results. If you think you can succeed then there’s a good chance that you will. The mind is very powerful – we create what we believe.
4. Success is closer than you think when you are down. Mistakes can be our teachers; they don’t mean all is lost. In fact, you’re one step closer to getting what you want.
5. You are not your mistakes. Don’t fall into the trap of defining who you are by different things you do – or by your failures and mistakes.
6. There are very few mistakes which are truly devastating. Mistakes are merely setbacks – a few clouds in the sky. Get up, keep pushing forwards and move towards your dreams.
7. A failure is sometimes a blessing in disguise. Not getting what you want can sometimes be a stroke of luck. It makes you reconsider and try some different things … And these can often lead to better opportunities.
8. You have the power to determine your own happiness. – You can hold onto the pain and the failures of the past – or you can choose to let them go and fix your eyes on what’s ahead. It’s up to you to choose what will become your destiny.
2. Everybody makes mistakes along the way. You’re only a failure if you give up and don’t try. Accept that you are human … and move on with your life.
3. Positive thinking leads to positive results. If you think you can succeed then there’s a good chance that you will. The mind is very powerful – we create what we believe.
4. Success is closer than you think when you are down. Mistakes can be our teachers; they don’t mean all is lost. In fact, you’re one step closer to getting what you want.
5. You are not your mistakes. Don’t fall into the trap of defining who you are by different things you do – or by your failures and mistakes.
6. There are very few mistakes which are truly devastating. Mistakes are merely setbacks – a few clouds in the sky. Get up, keep pushing forwards and move towards your dreams.
7. A failure is sometimes a blessing in disguise. Not getting what you want can sometimes be a stroke of luck. It makes you reconsider and try some different things … And these can often lead to better opportunities.
8. You have the power to determine your own happiness. – You can hold onto the pain and the failures of the past – or you can choose to let them go and fix your eyes on what’s ahead. It’s up to you to choose what will become your destiny.
Types of negative thinking that add to depression
1. All-or-nothing thinking - Looking at things in black-or-white categories, with no middle ground (“If I fall short of perfection, I’m a total failure.”)
2. Overgeneralization - Generalizing from a single negative experience, expecting it to hold true forever (“I can’t do anything right.”)
3. The mental filter - Ignoring positive events and focusing on the negative. Noticing the one thing that went wrong, rather than all the things that went right.
4. Diminishing the positive - Coming up with reasons why positive events don’t count (“She said she had a good time on our date, but I think she was just being nice.”)
5. Jumping to conclusions - Making negative interpretations without actual evidence. You act like a mind reader (“He must think I’m pathetic.”) or a fortune teller (“I’ll be stuck in this dead end job forever.”)
6. Emotional reasoning - Believing that the way you feel reflects reality (“I feel like such a loser. I really am no good!”)
7. ‘Shoulds’ and ‘should-nots’- Holding yourself to a strict list of what you should and shouldn’t do, and beating yourself up if you don’t live up to your rules.
8. Labeling - Labeling yourself based on mistakes and perceived shortcomings (“I’m a failure; an idiot; a loser.”)
Source: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_tips.htm
2. Overgeneralization - Generalizing from a single negative experience, expecting it to hold true forever (“I can’t do anything right.”)
3. The mental filter - Ignoring positive events and focusing on the negative. Noticing the one thing that went wrong, rather than all the things that went right.
4. Diminishing the positive - Coming up with reasons why positive events don’t count (“She said she had a good time on our date, but I think she was just being nice.”)
5. Jumping to conclusions - Making negative interpretations without actual evidence. You act like a mind reader (“He must think I’m pathetic.”) or a fortune teller (“I’ll be stuck in this dead end job forever.”)
6. Emotional reasoning - Believing that the way you feel reflects reality (“I feel like such a loser. I really am no good!”)
7. ‘Shoulds’ and ‘should-nots’- Holding yourself to a strict list of what you should and shouldn’t do, and beating yourself up if you don’t live up to your rules.
8. Labeling - Labeling yourself based on mistakes and perceived shortcomings (“I’m a failure; an idiot; a loser.”)
Source: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_tips.htm
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Boredom and Stress
1. Boredom drains our energy, and leads to feelings of apathy and listlessness.
2. It eats away at our motivation, and stops us from performing at our best. That, in turn, increases our levels of stress.
3. Boredom at school and work affects all ability levels – there is very little difference in how bored people feel, and how often they feel bored in these environments.
4. It is the second most common suppressed emotion (after anger). When we suppress our emotions it creates stress in our body and minds. This undermines our immune system and makes us more susceptible to illness and disease.
5. Boredom is exacerbated by having fewer people around you (for example, if you are a shift worker or you’re studying at home, alone). It could also be a greater source of stress for more extroverted individuals.
6. It may be partly due to our increasing need for constant stimulation – which also makes it harder for us to relax.
7. When we feel bored we tend to withdraw, or to become impatient, irritable, short-tempered, hostile and aggressive around others. That puts a strain on relationships.
8. Boredom often leads to participating in higher risk activities. These are stressful in themselves, and also have stressful side-effects. (For example, dangerous driving, or experimenting with drugs.)
2. It eats away at our motivation, and stops us from performing at our best. That, in turn, increases our levels of stress.
3. Boredom at school and work affects all ability levels – there is very little difference in how bored people feel, and how often they feel bored in these environments.
4. It is the second most common suppressed emotion (after anger). When we suppress our emotions it creates stress in our body and minds. This undermines our immune system and makes us more susceptible to illness and disease.
5. Boredom is exacerbated by having fewer people around you (for example, if you are a shift worker or you’re studying at home, alone). It could also be a greater source of stress for more extroverted individuals.
6. It may be partly due to our increasing need for constant stimulation – which also makes it harder for us to relax.
7. When we feel bored we tend to withdraw, or to become impatient, irritable, short-tempered, hostile and aggressive around others. That puts a strain on relationships.
8. Boredom often leads to participating in higher risk activities. These are stressful in themselves, and also have stressful side-effects. (For example, dangerous driving, or experimenting with drugs.)
Tips to Be Happy
Tip 1: Make happiness a priority. If happiness is not at the top of your list then other things will take precedence. If other things take precedence, they may well interfere with your efforts to feel good.
Tip 2: Make plans to be happy. Those who fail to plan, plan to fail. Just like in any other life domain, the successful pursuit of happiness requires planning.
Tip 3: Set happy goals. Following on from Tip 2, planning requires effective goal setting. And don’t forget to make sure your goals are SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and timed).
Tip 4: Do things that make you happy. Although this sounds obvious, many people simple forget to do things from which they gain pleasure. And do them as often as possible.
Tip 5: Set yourself tasks from which you’ll gain satisfaction. As well as pleasure and enjoyment, satisfaction is also an important part of happiness. So make sure that when you’re planning your tasks and activities you include things that might not be fun, but from which you’ll gain a sense of achievement.
Tip 6: Play and have fun. Don’t take life too seriously. Although we all have responsibilities there’s no reason why we can’t approach much of our lives in a playful manner. In fact, those who do so will undoubtedly be happier.
Tip 7: Identify where your strengths lie. Know where your faults and weaknesses are to avoid problems. Know where your strengths lie to be really happy and to succeed in life.
Tip 8: Utilise your strengths. Although we all can and should endeavour to improve in areas in which we’re weak there’s just as much, if not more, to be gained from focusing on the maximal utilisation of your strengths (including all your positive qualities and attributes).
Tip 9: Be curious. Constantly search for new ways to be happy. Keep a look out for new ways to approach life and to have fun.
Tip 10: Be grateful and appreciate what you have. We all have many choices in life one of which is whether to focus on all the things we don’t have (of which there might be many), or to focus on all the things we do have. There’s no doubt, that gratitude and appreciation will significantly increase your chances of experiencing happiness.
Tip 11: Learn to like and ideally to love yourself. We must love before we can be loved. To love others and to be loved by others is a key component of happiness.
Tip 12: Invest time and energy in to your key relationships. Happy people spend more time working on and in their relationships. Happy people tend to be more supportive of other people in their life. Happy people are more generous and altruistic.
Tip 13: Socialise and interact with others as much as possible. Happy people have both more and better quality relationships. So as well as working to improve the quality of your relationships (as noted in Tip 12) it’s also worthwhile working to improve the number of your relationships.
Tip 14: Weed out unhelpful thoughts. The Dalai Lama has been quoted saying that “The central method for achieving a happier life is to train your mind in a daily practice that weakens negative attitudes and strengthens positive ones.” Learn first to identify your thoughts and then begin to challenge those that are negative and unhelpful.
Tip 15: Plant happier, optimistic thoughts. As noted in Tip 14, there are two parts to developing helpful, optimistic thinking. The first is to weed out unhelpful negative thoughts and the second is to plant more positive, optimistic ones. This is essentially a skill, and like any other skill becomes easier and more effective with practice.
Tip 16: Live a healthy life. Eat well and keep active. Exercise regularly. Although not impossible, it’s difficult to be happy if you’re constantly sick and not very healthy.
Tip 17: Ensure you gain adequate sleep and rest. Consistent with Tip 16, it’s difficult to be happy if you’re constantly tired and struggling to find enough energy to get through the day. To assist with this, regularly practice relaxation and/or meditation strategies.
Tip 18: Manage your time and priorities. Happy people tend to believe they’re more in control of their lives. In doing so, they’re more likely to take an active approach to solving problems. If something’s not quite right in your life, do something. And further, make sure that what you’re doing is important. Put first things first.
Tip 19: Control what you can control. Accept what you can’t control. And learn to be wise enough to know the difference.
Tip 20: Live in the present moment. The author, Henry Miller once said “Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognise it as such.” The only moment in which we can truly be happy is the present moment. The only moment over which we have control is the present moment. So be happy now! Because if not now, then when?
Tip 2: Make plans to be happy. Those who fail to plan, plan to fail. Just like in any other life domain, the successful pursuit of happiness requires planning.
Tip 3: Set happy goals. Following on from Tip 2, planning requires effective goal setting. And don’t forget to make sure your goals are SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and timed).
Tip 4: Do things that make you happy. Although this sounds obvious, many people simple forget to do things from which they gain pleasure. And do them as often as possible.
Tip 5: Set yourself tasks from which you’ll gain satisfaction. As well as pleasure and enjoyment, satisfaction is also an important part of happiness. So make sure that when you’re planning your tasks and activities you include things that might not be fun, but from which you’ll gain a sense of achievement.
Tip 6: Play and have fun. Don’t take life too seriously. Although we all have responsibilities there’s no reason why we can’t approach much of our lives in a playful manner. In fact, those who do so will undoubtedly be happier.
Tip 7: Identify where your strengths lie. Know where your faults and weaknesses are to avoid problems. Know where your strengths lie to be really happy and to succeed in life.
Tip 8: Utilise your strengths. Although we all can and should endeavour to improve in areas in which we’re weak there’s just as much, if not more, to be gained from focusing on the maximal utilisation of your strengths (including all your positive qualities and attributes).
Tip 9: Be curious. Constantly search for new ways to be happy. Keep a look out for new ways to approach life and to have fun.
Tip 10: Be grateful and appreciate what you have. We all have many choices in life one of which is whether to focus on all the things we don’t have (of which there might be many), or to focus on all the things we do have. There’s no doubt, that gratitude and appreciation will significantly increase your chances of experiencing happiness.
Tip 11: Learn to like and ideally to love yourself. We must love before we can be loved. To love others and to be loved by others is a key component of happiness.
Tip 12: Invest time and energy in to your key relationships. Happy people spend more time working on and in their relationships. Happy people tend to be more supportive of other people in their life. Happy people are more generous and altruistic.
Tip 13: Socialise and interact with others as much as possible. Happy people have both more and better quality relationships. So as well as working to improve the quality of your relationships (as noted in Tip 12) it’s also worthwhile working to improve the number of your relationships.
Tip 14: Weed out unhelpful thoughts. The Dalai Lama has been quoted saying that “The central method for achieving a happier life is to train your mind in a daily practice that weakens negative attitudes and strengthens positive ones.” Learn first to identify your thoughts and then begin to challenge those that are negative and unhelpful.
Tip 15: Plant happier, optimistic thoughts. As noted in Tip 14, there are two parts to developing helpful, optimistic thinking. The first is to weed out unhelpful negative thoughts and the second is to plant more positive, optimistic ones. This is essentially a skill, and like any other skill becomes easier and more effective with practice.
Tip 16: Live a healthy life. Eat well and keep active. Exercise regularly. Although not impossible, it’s difficult to be happy if you’re constantly sick and not very healthy.
Tip 17: Ensure you gain adequate sleep and rest. Consistent with Tip 16, it’s difficult to be happy if you’re constantly tired and struggling to find enough energy to get through the day. To assist with this, regularly practice relaxation and/or meditation strategies.
Tip 18: Manage your time and priorities. Happy people tend to believe they’re more in control of their lives. In doing so, they’re more likely to take an active approach to solving problems. If something’s not quite right in your life, do something. And further, make sure that what you’re doing is important. Put first things first.
Tip 19: Control what you can control. Accept what you can’t control. And learn to be wise enough to know the difference.
Tip 20: Live in the present moment. The author, Henry Miller once said “Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognise it as such.” The only moment in which we can truly be happy is the present moment. The only moment over which we have control is the present moment. So be happy now! Because if not now, then when?
Barriers to Success
1. Seeing success as being determined by external factors. (So if I fail it’s circumstances or someone else’s fault.) This takes away my sense of power and keeps me stuck in failure and helplessness.
2. Personal blind spots. Sometimes we keep failing but we’re blind to the fact that there’s something we’re doing that is causing us to fail. That could be related to our communication style, our attitudes, lack of knowledge and ability, pursuing something that doesn’t suit our gifts and talents, and so on.
3. Self sabotage. Sometimes we don’t feel we deserve to succeed so unconsciously we do something that causes us to fail. This includes meditating on self-limiting thoughts (Eg, “I could never …; I don’t deserve …”).
4. Feeling ambivalent about the goals you’ve set. We often set a goal that is someone else’s goal so we’re not really sure if it’s what we want ourselves. That affects our motivation, and our will to succeed.
5. Fear of change. All successes bring some change – and that can feel quite threatening. And we’re often comfortable with the way our life is now – so we wonder if success will really make us happier.
6. Pressure from others who don’t want you to succeed. It’s very common for our peers to feel threatened by success, and we know they’ll be sarcastic or unkind if we succeed. Hence, we don’t try our hardest as we recognise the cost will be possible rejection, or the loss of some good friends.
2. Personal blind spots. Sometimes we keep failing but we’re blind to the fact that there’s something we’re doing that is causing us to fail. That could be related to our communication style, our attitudes, lack of knowledge and ability, pursuing something that doesn’t suit our gifts and talents, and so on.
3. Self sabotage. Sometimes we don’t feel we deserve to succeed so unconsciously we do something that causes us to fail. This includes meditating on self-limiting thoughts (Eg, “I could never …; I don’t deserve …”).
4. Feeling ambivalent about the goals you’ve set. We often set a goal that is someone else’s goal so we’re not really sure if it’s what we want ourselves. That affects our motivation, and our will to succeed.
5. Fear of change. All successes bring some change – and that can feel quite threatening. And we’re often comfortable with the way our life is now – so we wonder if success will really make us happier.
6. Pressure from others who don’t want you to succeed. It’s very common for our peers to feel threatened by success, and we know they’ll be sarcastic or unkind if we succeed. Hence, we don’t try our hardest as we recognise the cost will be possible rejection, or the loss of some good friends.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Which Baby Are You?
JANUARY BABY
Pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive. Down-to-Earth. Stubborn. Repost this in 5 mins and you will meet someone new in 8 days that will perfectly balance your personality.
FEBRUARY BABY
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Highly attractive. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest And loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Horny. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions. Repost this in 5 mins and you will talk to someone new and realize that you are a perfect match.
MARCH BABY
Attractive personality. Affectionate Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others.Great kisser. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others. If you repost this in the next 5 mins, you will meet your new love in 8 days.
APRIL BABY
Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confidant. Sensitive. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and traveling. Systematic. Hot but has brains. If you repost this in 5 mins, a cutie that’s caught your eye will introduce themselves and you will realize that you are very much alike in the next 2 days.
MAY BABY
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards others they find attractive. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High-spirited. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will become close to someone you do not speak too much in the next 4 days.
JUNE BABY
You’ve got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have an a very attractive partner. a wicked hottie. It is also more than likely that you have a massive record collection. You have a great choice in films, and may one day become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you’ve got the looks for it!!! IN the next 6 days you will meet someone that may possibly become one of your closest friends, if you repost this in 5 minutes.
JULY BABY
Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people’s feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. spazzy at times. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover. Repost this in the next 5 mins and your reputation will boost someway in the next 12 days
AUGUST BABY
Outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. No self-control. Kind hearted. Self-confident. Loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. Easy to get along with and talk to. Has an “every thing’s peachy” attitude. Likes talking and singing. Loves music. Daydreamer. Easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. Loves to be loved. Hates studying. in need of “that someone”. Longs for freedom. Rebellious when withheld or restricted. Lives by “no pain no gain” caring. Always a suspect. Playful. Mysterious. “charming” or “beautiful” to everyone. stubborn. curious. Independent. Strong willed. A fighter. Repost in 5 mins and you will meet the love of your life sometime next month.
SEPTEMBER BABY
Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes attractive in a way that only their lover can understand. If you do not repost this in the next 5 mins, someone very close to you will become mad at you in the next 8 days.
OCTOBER BABY
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. Extremely smart, but definitely the most attractive of them all. repost this in 5 mins or you will not meet the love of your life for 10 years.
NOVEMBER BABY
Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Attractive and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, the greatest men are born in this month. If you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind. Repost in 5 mins & you will excel in a major event coming up sometime this month.
DECEMBER BABY
This straight-up means you are the most good-looking person possible… Better than all of these other months! Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Competitive in everything. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Has that someone always on his/her mind. Talkative. Daydreamer.Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Abiding. Able to show character. One guy/girl kind of person. Loveable. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves music. Pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive.
FEBRUARY BABY
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Highly attractive. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest And loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Horny. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions. Repost this in 5 mins and you will talk to someone new and realize that you are a perfect match.
MARCH BABY
Attractive personality. Affectionate Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others.Great kisser. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others. If you repost this in the next 5 mins, you will meet your new love in 8 days.
APRIL BABY
Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confidant. Sensitive. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and traveling. Systematic. Hot but has brains. If you repost this in 5 mins, a cutie that’s caught your eye will introduce themselves and you will realize that you are very much alike in the next 2 days.
MAY BABY
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards others they find attractive. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High-spirited. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will become close to someone you do not speak too much in the next 4 days.
JUNE BABY
You’ve got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have an a very attractive partner. a wicked hottie. It is also more than likely that you have a massive record collection. You have a great choice in films, and may one day become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you’ve got the looks for it!!! IN the next 6 days you will meet someone that may possibly become one of your closest friends, if you repost this in 5 minutes.
JULY BABY
Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people’s feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. spazzy at times. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover. Repost this in the next 5 mins and your reputation will boost someway in the next 12 days
AUGUST BABY
Outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. No self-control. Kind hearted. Self-confident. Loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. Easy to get along with and talk to. Has an “every thing’s peachy” attitude. Likes talking and singing. Loves music. Daydreamer. Easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. Loves to be loved. Hates studying. in need of “that someone”. Longs for freedom. Rebellious when withheld or restricted. Lives by “no pain no gain” caring. Always a suspect. Playful. Mysterious. “charming” or “beautiful” to everyone. stubborn. curious. Independent. Strong willed. A fighter. Repost in 5 mins and you will meet the love of your life sometime next month.
SEPTEMBER BABY
Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes attractive in a way that only their lover can understand. If you do not repost this in the next 5 mins, someone very close to you will become mad at you in the next 8 days.
OCTOBER BABY
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. Extremely smart, but definitely the most attractive of them all. repost this in 5 mins or you will not meet the love of your life for 10 years.
NOVEMBER BABY
Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Attractive and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, the greatest men are born in this month. If you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind. Repost in 5 mins & you will excel in a major event coming up sometime this month.
DECEMBER BABY
This straight-up means you are the most good-looking person possible… Better than all of these other months! Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Competitive in everything. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Has that someone always on his/her mind. Talkative. Daydreamer.Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Abiding. Able to show character. One guy/girl kind of person. Loveable. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves music. Pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive.
How to Achieve your Best at School
1. Aim high. Plan on always getting the best marks you can in each test you take. Measure yourself against yourself. Try to get a higher score on this test than the last test.
2. Plan how your will complete your assignments in advance. You need to know what you are doing, when you are doing it, and have a deadline for when it will be completed, before you even start working on the assignment.
3. Devise an effective study plan so you are constantly preparing for exams, and don’t have to cram at the last minute when you feel you’re running out of time.
4. Know what you’re being evaluated on, and what the different weightings are. (Assignments, tests, exams, presentations, group work, attendance, class participation etc.)
5. Ask your teachers or professors for help if there’s something you can’t do, or don’t understand.
6. Learn new material and concepts as soon as it’s taught. Our memory fades quickly, and we require rehearsal and practice to consolidate learning, and transfer material to our long term memory.
7. Take notes, and try putting ideas, concepts and facts into your own words. Summarise the material in your mind – but then test yourself on important details.
8. Investigate webcasts and use those to enhance, and enrich, your learning.
9. Make use of small pockets of time to work on assignments, and to fit in extra studying and self-testing.
10. Do past papers and talk to others who have sat the exams before.
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2. Plan how your will complete your assignments in advance. You need to know what you are doing, when you are doing it, and have a deadline for when it will be completed, before you even start working on the assignment.
3. Devise an effective study plan so you are constantly preparing for exams, and don’t have to cram at the last minute when you feel you’re running out of time.
4. Know what you’re being evaluated on, and what the different weightings are. (Assignments, tests, exams, presentations, group work, attendance, class participation etc.)
5. Ask your teachers or professors for help if there’s something you can’t do, or don’t understand.
6. Learn new material and concepts as soon as it’s taught. Our memory fades quickly, and we require rehearsal and practice to consolidate learning, and transfer material to our long term memory.
7. Take notes, and try putting ideas, concepts and facts into your own words. Summarise the material in your mind – but then test yourself on important details.
8. Investigate webcasts and use those to enhance, and enrich, your learning.
9. Make use of small pockets of time to work on assignments, and to fit in extra studying and self-testing.
10. Do past papers and talk to others who have sat the exams before.
v
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